Psalm 41 wrenches my heart out today

Psalm 41wrenches my heart out today, some parts more than others.

¹ Oh, the joys of those who are kind to the poor!

    The Lord rescues them when they are in trouble.
² The Lord protects them
    and keeps them alive.
He gives them prosperity in the land
    and rescues them from their enemies.
³ The Lord nurses them when they are sick
    and restores them to health.

⁴ “O Lord,” I prayed, “have mercy on me.
    Heal me, for I have sinned against you.”
⁵ But my enemies say nothing but evil about me.
    “How soon will he die and be forgotten?” they ask.
⁶ They visit me as if they were my friends,
    but all the while they gather gossip,
    and when they leave, they spread it everywhere.
⁷ All who hate me whisper about me,
    imagining the worst.
⁸ “He has some fatal disease,” they say.
    “He will never get out of that bed!”
⁹ Even my best friend, the one I trusted completely,
    the one who shared my food, has turned against me.

¹⁰ Lord, have mercy on me.
    Make me well again, so I can pay them back!
¹¹ I know you are pleased with me,
    for you have not let my enemies triumph over me.
¹² You have preserved my life because I am innocent;
    you have brought me into your presence forever.

¹³ Praise the Lord, the God of Israel,
    who lives from everlasting to everlasting.
Amen and amen!

(From the New Living Translation)